Your Significant Other and Gaming
My apologies if a thread like this has been posted before (and I'm almost certain it has), but I have a question for the NA collective: What does your significant other think about your gaming and collecting?
I ask because I've recently realized what an impact it can have on the dynamic of a relationship.
My girlfriend and I bond over all things gaming. When I am hooked on a new game and really enjoying my experience with it (like I currently am with Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain), I want to talk about it with someone. If my girlfriend weren't into gaming, I'd probably still talk her ear off about it and annoy the shit out of her by constantly bringing it up in conversation. When I'm playing a game, she likes to watch and take in the story, or give me input on creative ways I could destroy an enemy base, etc. She has said many times that she'd way rather do that than watch TV shows together. We don't always play the same kind of games (in fact, we rarely do), but we enjoy talking about them and explaining them to each other. We have a few games we play together, and on nights that we stay in and relax and have a few drinks together, we'll usually lay on the couch and break out the 3DS' and play some local multiplayer Mario Kart (until we find other activities to keep busy with ). I have been collecting rather seriously over the past couple of years, and that has really influenced her to step up her collecting as well. So when I finally find that rare gem I've been seeking out for my collection, she's happy for me and it's something for us to talk about and bond over. We're supportive of each other's hobbies and interests (I play and record music, she's heavily into fitness etc), but gaming is the one hobby the we both mutually enjoy, and it kind of ties a lot of things together for us and has strengthened our relationship.
All of my best friends' girlfriends and wives pretty much unanimously hate gaming. A recent group text conversation between myself and my 5 best friends really made me realize that I may be taking my mutual affinity for gaming with my girlfriend for granted. A friend of mine was venting to us about a fight he was having with his wife, and seeking advice. He had left the house to blow off some steam, and when he returned his wife had hidden all of his games and consoles on him and refused to tell him where she had hidden them. Every time we're playing online together you can always hear someone's girlfriend or wife complaining ("are you guys playing that stupid game again?", "ugh those things are for kids, why do you guys still play them?", etc) in the background. Mind you I would understand the annoyance if we did this every night for hours and neglected our significant others, kids and household duties, but we're talking about once or twice a week for maybe an hour between friends of 20-25+ years who have all moved to different cities and use gaming as a conduit to keep in touch with each other. Instead the annoyance simply comes from their disdain for gaming, and the fact that it's a social outlet for their boyfriends/husbands that they aren't participating in. I've seen it cause many arguments between my friends and their significant others, and it's made me appreciate the fact that it's something that unites my girlfriend and I that we have in common, instead of dividing us and having it be a constant topic of contention.
So back to my original question: how does your significant other feel about your gaming and collecting? NintendoAge for the most part is a website for the more "hardcore" gamers, collectors, and hobbyists, and it stands to reason that your significant other has an opinion on the matter. Are they for it or against it? How does it affect the other facets of your relationship? Is it something you bond over together, or argue about? Am I the only lucky one?? Let's hear it
I ask because I've recently realized what an impact it can have on the dynamic of a relationship.
My girlfriend and I bond over all things gaming. When I am hooked on a new game and really enjoying my experience with it (like I currently am with Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain), I want to talk about it with someone. If my girlfriend weren't into gaming, I'd probably still talk her ear off about it and annoy the shit out of her by constantly bringing it up in conversation. When I'm playing a game, she likes to watch and take in the story, or give me input on creative ways I could destroy an enemy base, etc. She has said many times that she'd way rather do that than watch TV shows together. We don't always play the same kind of games (in fact, we rarely do), but we enjoy talking about them and explaining them to each other. We have a few games we play together, and on nights that we stay in and relax and have a few drinks together, we'll usually lay on the couch and break out the 3DS' and play some local multiplayer Mario Kart (until we find other activities to keep busy with ). I have been collecting rather seriously over the past couple of years, and that has really influenced her to step up her collecting as well. So when I finally find that rare gem I've been seeking out for my collection, she's happy for me and it's something for us to talk about and bond over. We're supportive of each other's hobbies and interests (I play and record music, she's heavily into fitness etc), but gaming is the one hobby the we both mutually enjoy, and it kind of ties a lot of things together for us and has strengthened our relationship.
All of my best friends' girlfriends and wives pretty much unanimously hate gaming. A recent group text conversation between myself and my 5 best friends really made me realize that I may be taking my mutual affinity for gaming with my girlfriend for granted. A friend of mine was venting to us about a fight he was having with his wife, and seeking advice. He had left the house to blow off some steam, and when he returned his wife had hidden all of his games and consoles on him and refused to tell him where she had hidden them. Every time we're playing online together you can always hear someone's girlfriend or wife complaining ("are you guys playing that stupid game again?", "ugh those things are for kids, why do you guys still play them?", etc) in the background. Mind you I would understand the annoyance if we did this every night for hours and neglected our significant others, kids and household duties, but we're talking about once or twice a week for maybe an hour between friends of 20-25+ years who have all moved to different cities and use gaming as a conduit to keep in touch with each other. Instead the annoyance simply comes from their disdain for gaming, and the fact that it's a social outlet for their boyfriends/husbands that they aren't participating in. I've seen it cause many arguments between my friends and their significant others, and it's made me appreciate the fact that it's something that unites my girlfriend and I that we have in common, instead of dividing us and having it be a constant topic of contention.
So back to my original question: how does your significant other feel about your gaming and collecting? NintendoAge for the most part is a website for the more "hardcore" gamers, collectors, and hobbyists, and it stands to reason that your significant other has an opinion on the matter. Are they for it or against it? How does it affect the other facets of your relationship? Is it something you bond over together, or argue about? Am I the only lucky one?? Let's hear it
Comments
My fiance hates gaming. She was okay with it when we first got together 12 years ago, and all I had was NES. Heck, we even bonded over Duck Hunt. Now I've got like a dozen consoles and she leaves the room whenever I turn on a game.
She accepts my hobby though for what it is. She currently resides in a two bedroom apartment. When I finally become financially independent and we move in together, we'll upgrade to a three bedroom townhouse / apartment, and I'll have the thrid bedroom all to myself to store my gaming collection. We'll see how that goes, heh...
Seriously though, treasure SO's that like gaming, it could be way worse.
My wife is not into gaming, but its not at all an issue. She has interests that I am not into, fashion brands, bravo tv shows, etc. We have plenty of mutual interests, and plenty that aren't mutual. I respect her right to spend money and time on what she likes, and she respects my right to do the same. She will be happy for me when I come across an underpriced game and will listen to me go on about how cool it is and what a score I got. I do the same for her when she finds a great sale on pair of high end shoes. I have posted in more detail about this in previous threads, but in short, if you respect each other and have a healthy relationship, having some different interests is no big deal at all. I actually like that we have our mutual interests that we enjoy doing together, but also have our own things. I don't know if I would want to have EVERYTHING in common, but too each their own.
+1
She doesn't mind my collecting at all, when she can easily add a piece to my collection she does
My wife does a very good job of trying to share the common interest with me but is no means nearly as into it as I am. We played some games together that she enjoys but usually just me playing.
She doesn't mind my collecting at all, when she can easily add a piece to my collection she does
Yer welcome, love
Originally posted by: stardust4ever
Yeah you've got one of the rare ones. Don't lose her.
My fiance hates gaming. She was okay with it when we first got together 12 years ago, and all I had was NES. Heck, we even bonded over Duck Hunt. Now I've got like a dozen consoles and she leaves the room whenever I turn on a game.
She accepts my hobby though for what it is. She currently resides in a two bedroom apartment. When I finally become financially independent and we move in together, we'll upgrade to a three bedroom townhouse / apartment, and I'll have the thrid bedroom all to myself to store my gaming collection. We'll see how that goes, heh...
12 years and engaged but not living together?
As long as it's a game she likes (SMB, SMW, Kirby, Donkey Kong) then sometimes she'll suggest I play and she'll just watch.
I started trying to play games we could take some time on and still be fun. Something where she can have input but not have to complete all the really tricky parts. So we started with SMB3. She tells me what path to take (level order, mushroom houses), and even did some of the mini games, and I beat the shit out of all the enemies and bosses. It's a good combination.
We then moved on to Donkey Kong Country. We are at King K. Rool right now in DKC2 so we are moving along that series well.
She's also pretty stoked for me to have my own "gaming room" and has painted me a few different characters (Luigi & Princess Peach) for the walls and will help design it with me.
I feel very lucky to be with her.
My Wife tolerates the hobby. She won't go around looking for games with me, but she'll humor me when I come home and show my acquisitions. She loves Mario, but won't really give any other games a shot.
Not into clothes shopping at thrift stores??
Luckily, my gf loves clothes and used clothes. She also loves old furniture and odd things. So thrift stores are a place we both love to go.
Don't find a ton anymore, but hey, its a nice little afternoon checking it out.
The ironic part, is that my XBox 360 is really hers. I inherited it when we got married. She got it JUST FOR playing Kinect dance games. Apparantly those are the only games that are not for kids.,......
Originally posted by: AirVillain
Originally posted by: Silent Hill
My Wife tolerates the hobby. She won't go around looking for games with me, but she'll humor me when I come home and show my acquisitions. She loves Mario, but won't really give any other games a shot.
Not into clothes shopping at thrift stores??
Luckily, my gf loves clothes and used clothes. She also loves old furniture and odd things. So thrift stores are a place we both love to go.
Don't find a ton anymore, but hey, its a nice little afternoon checking it out.
Nah, she's finicky with clothes in general, especially used stuff. Also, our decor is very one-dimensional so finding any odds and ends to compliment it would be tough. My only hope are places that carry other media as well as games and even then it's a chore for her.
As for playing, she doesn't care if I do. As long as I do it on my own time and not when I'm supposed to be busy being a husband and father. Which is fine by me. She always says she would rather have me in the basement gaming then out at the bars, etc.
My wife is extremely apathetic too my hobby. She couldn't care less what I do or don't do about video gaming. She'll be happy for me when I found a great deal or whatever, but doesn't partake in any way.
As for playing, she doesn't care if I do. As long as I do it on my own time and not when I'm supposed to be busy being a husband and father. Which is fine by me. She always says she would rather have me in the basement gaming then out at the bars, etc.
I wish my wife would appreciate that last part. There are much worse things in life then collecting video games.
Originally posted by: Silent Hill
Originally posted by: AirVillain
Originally posted by: Silent Hill
My Wife tolerates the hobby. She won't go around looking for games with me, but she'll humor me when I come home and show my acquisitions. She loves Mario, but won't really give any other games a shot.
Not into clothes shopping at thrift stores??
Luckily, my gf loves clothes and used clothes. She also loves old furniture and odd things. So thrift stores are a place we both love to go.
Don't find a ton anymore, but hey, its a nice little afternoon checking it out.
Nah, she's finicky with clothes in general, especially used stuff. Also, our decor is very one-dimensional so finding any odds and ends to compliment it would be tough. My only hope are places that carry other media as well as games and even then it's a chore for her.
Yeah, I gotcha. There's so many DVD's and random games that a person that not specifically looking for them.
Originally posted by: TDIRunner
Originally posted by: JauneyStudios
My wife is extremely apathetic too my hobby. She couldn't care less what I do or don't do about video gaming. She'll be happy for me when I found a great deal or whatever, but doesn't partake in any way.
As for playing, she doesn't care if I do. As long as I do it on my own time and not when I'm supposed to be busy being a husband and father. Which is fine by me. She always says she would rather have me in the basement gaming then out at the bars, etc.
I wish my wife would appreciate that last part. There are much worse things in life then collecting video games.
Exactly.
Video Games > Booze
I know for myself, I'd much rather be spending my money on video games than in a bar or on a 6 pack. I've been there, done that. I'm happy to play video games.
She plays through games like Earthbound and Final Fantasy 6 with me!
I couldn't ask for more.
(Also she tells me if I'm spending too much money, which is healthy.)
My wife is extremely apathetic too my hobby. She couldn't care less what I do or don't do about video gaming. She'll be happy for me when I found a great deal or whatever, but doesn't partake in any way.
As for playing, she doesn't care if I do. As long as I do it on my own time and not when I'm supposed to be busy being a husband and father. Which is fine by me. She always says she would rather have me in the basement gaming then out at the bars, etc.
I wish my wife would appreciate that last part. There are much worse things in life then collecting video games.
with a bun in the oven I understand that trying to win trophy carts in the weekly contest will be my bar for the next 18 years.
that being said, I couldn't be happier to be a father. And going to a bar can't hold a candle to being a dad.
But as far as bars vs. video games. Bars win hands down.
My SO.plays some. SNES is her retro. Super ghouls n ghost and zombies ate my neighbors. She entertains me by listening to my rants of NES things.
My wife is extremely apathetic too my hobby. She couldn't care less what I do or don't do about video gaming. She'll be happy for me when I found a great deal or whatever, but doesn't partake in any way.
As for playing, she doesn't care if I do. As long as I do it on my own time and not when I'm supposed to be busy being a husband and father. Which is fine by me. She always says she would rather have me in the basement gaming then out at the bars, etc.
I wish my wife would appreciate that last part. There are much worse things in life then collecting video games.
Bars are so much more fun than video games.
But with a bun in the oven I understand that trying to win trophy carts in the weekly contest will be my bar for the next 18 years.
that being said, I couldn't be happier to be a father. And going to a bar can't hold a candle to being a dad.
But as far as bars vs. video games. Bars win hands down.
My SO.plays some. SNES is her retro. Super ghouls n ghost and zombies ate my neighbors. She entertains me by listening to my rants of NES things.
Meh. Maybe when I was younger, but I'm good drinking at home, while playing video games. I don't get much enjoyment out of bars anymore, outside of the occasional meeting friends for diner and drinks.
However, there is a new "barcade" near my home. It's all older arcade and pinball machines. Everything is coin operated (no "power car" crap). And of course, they serve drinks. It's a cool place to hange out every once and a while. But at the end of the day, I just assume hang out at home.
This is why I have my own game room with all my retro stuff...I never get a chance to play anything else anyway.
There are a few NES/SNES games that she enjoys to play in the 2 player mode. Mainly Yoshi's Cookie she loves, and can actually beat me in.
She doesn't like any 3D games generally, but there are actually a few PS1 games she really likes. Space Invaders, Q*Bert, Ten Pin Alley, she's always down to play those particular titles. She also really likes Destruction Derby PS2 and Outlaw Golf 2 PS2. Those are the most modern console games I've ever seen her play.
She also really likes trivia games. We played through every episode and every download pack of You Don't Know Jack for Xbox 360 together.
She plays mostly casual phone games (don't hate), but she's made a converted effort to play a few games in the past year with me.
Overall she likes it cause it makes me happy. I did actually mention dark souls in our wedding vows and she got a kick out of that.
My GF loves looking for games, and even went to PRGE with me for 2 days. SO yeah shes cool
My wife is extremely apathetic too my hobby. She couldn't care less what I do or don't do about video gaming. She'll be happy for me when I found a great deal or whatever, but doesn't partake in any way.
As for playing, she doesn't care if I do. As long as I do it on my own time and not when I'm supposed to be busy being a husband and father. Which is fine by me. She always says she would rather have me in the basement gaming then out at the bars, etc.
I wish my wife would appreciate that last part. There are much worse things in life then collecting video games.
Bars are so much more fun than video games.
But with a bun in the oven I understand that trying to win trophy carts in the weekly contest will be my bar for the next 18 years.
that being said, I couldn't be happier to be a father. And going to a bar can't hold a candle to being a dad.
But as far as bars vs. video games. Bars win hands down.
My SO.plays some. SNES is her retro. Super ghouls n ghost and zombies ate my neighbors. She entertains me by listening to my rants of NES things.
Meh. Maybe when I was younger, but I'm good drinking at home, while playing video games. I don't get much enjoyment out of bars anymore, outside of the occasional meeting friends for diner and drinks.
However, there is a new "barcade" near my home. It's all older arcade and pinball machines. Everything is coin operated (no "power car" crap). And of course, they serve drinks. It's a cool place to hange out every once and a while. But at the end of the day, I just assume hang out at home.
Last time I went to visit my girlfriend's family in Ohio, we went to a place just outside of Cleveland called 16-bit. It's a "barcade" as you cleverly called it. The place was great! All the machines were on free play as long as you were actually a patron of the bar and not just loitering. My girlfriend and I played Terminator 2: The Arcade Game and I came to realize something: that game was not designed to be beaten. If we had been playing with quarters, we would've spent about 15 bucks each getting to T-1000, and probably another 20 trying to beat him, which never actually happened. We had to give up and walk away from it. Awesome experience though! The place had all Nintendo-themed decor and the people that worked there were all gamers. Can't wait to go again.
Ah yes, #humblebrag thread
My GF loves looking for games, and even went to PRGE with me for 2 days. SO yeah shes cool
Nothing humble about it my friend. If you're lucky enough to snag a good woman who's also into games, be loud and proud about it I say.
That's awesome that your GF went to PRGE with you, I was trying to get the time off work to go, but working 12 hour shifts and living a good distance away from the expo, I just couldn't pull it off this year. Next year!
Originally posted by: Silent Hill
Originally posted by: stardust4ever
Yeah you've got one of the rare ones. Don't lose her.
My fiance hates gaming. She was okay with it when we first got together 12 years ago, and all I had was NES. Heck, we even bonded over Duck Hunt. Now I've got like a dozen consoles and she leaves the room whenever I turn on a game.
She accepts my hobby though for what it is. She currently resides in a two bedroom apartment. When I finally become financially independent and we move in together, we'll upgrade to a three bedroom townhouse / apartment, and I'll have the thrid bedroom all to myself to store my gaming collection. We'll see how that goes, heh...
12 years and engaged but not living together?
I spend about 50% of my time at her house; she spends about 50% of her time at my house, so we kinda do live together in a way...